tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-66950875046864013022024-03-05T14:52:22.831-08:00MobyJaneA. B. Curtiss, board-certified cognitive behavioral therapist, diplomate of the board--psychology, certified hypnotist, author of 12 books, creator of interstitial choice and brainswitching, a system of mind exercises to get out of depression. Her books have been translated in 5 languages including Japanese and Russian . Here are letters from readers with questions about depression, anxiety, insomnia, bipolar, fear, and the author's answers.....
Make the day count..... Be gentle with yourself.A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.comBlogger574125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-33235874605500256912018-03-19T18:41:00.004-07:002018-03-19T18:41:49.308-07:00Mourning my Husband<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">Hi
Ms. Curtiss,<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">I
purchased your book, “Depression Is a Choice” when it first came out and found
it a breath of fresh air.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Lately,
however, I have not been completely convinced about the choice part because I
am feeling that my current depression is bigger than I am.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">A
few months ago, my husband of 35 years died of throat cancer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He is a man who is irreplaceable, especially
at my ripe old age of 68.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have been
going to a grief group, dealing with my depression over this with a therapist,
but do not seem to be able to pull myself out of this one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What is your take of the grief process and
how it relates to depression?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
general wisdom is you have to go through it, and everyone has their own time
table.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, this happened over 4
months ago, and I feel worse now, so I am questioning my handling of things.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">Anything
you could offer me would be greatly appreciated as I find you very well spoken
and very well thought out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>BTW, I just
purchased your 2nd book from Amazon, and looking forward to more of your wisdom
within its covers.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">Thank
you,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Dear Friend<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">Mourning
is one of the sacred ceremonies of life. But we must not let the ceremony of
honoring what we have lost slide into the mere chemical imbalance of depression
wherein we merely suffer and have lost sight of what we have lost and are
mourning. Remember that we don't live our lives by the year, or<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>even by the day. We live life by the instant.
Look for what can uplift you in nature, a small flower, a friendly tree, a
beautiful cloud. In connecting with your fellow man, even just a friendly
remark to the person ahead of you in the grocery line is reconnecting with
life.. Instant by instant we must find something to love, to honor or respect
for in that instant we are connected with all life and bit by bit we string
together these precious moments to find peace. May God bless you. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A. B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">Dear
Ms. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">Thank
you for your lovely words and being so generous with your time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will hold those words close and abide by
them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will definitely use the tools in
your second depression book, when I receive it, as I see I have let grief slip
me into the depression abyss.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My goal is
to find a way to live “around” the grief, and am sure your book will help.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">A
thousand thank you’s,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-75785417327554849072018-03-08T12:21:00.001-08:002018-03-08T12:27:02.177-08:00I've Never Felt Truly Happy<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Dear AB<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I am
almost 16 and have never truly felt happy. I do not fear depression, I only
fear of letting it win. I have had very traumatic experiences ever since I can
remember. It just has never gotten better.</span></div>
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<b>Dear Never Truly Happy</b>,</div>
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<span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">You
are not alone. The new generations of Americans are known for their
rootlessness and a feeling of not belonging and flat out unhappiness. Our whole society has become less connected. People are
connecting to the Internet, to virtual connections like facebook or twitter
instead of connecting with each other. People move all the time and the
lifestyle of knowing most of the people in our small town is long gone. The
only help for us humans is to somehow figure out how to connect with like-minded
people. It takes some effort on your part but…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The
trick is to use the Internet not as an end in itself but to use it to connect
to real people in some way. If you like to hike, you will find a list of where
to meet other hikers on Meetup.com for your area. There might be one or two other groups meeting that you might find interesting. </span><br />
<span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><br /></span>
<span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">It is always possible to make some small connection with our fellow man even if it's just to say "nice day, isn't it" to the next person in the grocery checkout line. Or waiting in line at the Post Office or for movie tickets. It takes a little courage to be the first to make a friendly remark to a stranger, but let me en-courage you
to do it. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A.B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-35213086847549400392017-12-08T11:10:00.001-08:002017-12-08T15:02:51.799-08:00Your Book Helps Me a Lot<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.0pt;">Hi Curtis,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.0pt;">My name is ____________ I bought
your book at your booksigning. We were there and you signed it too.
I have been reading it because I was or I am interested in knowing
how our brain works when going through depression. I had an episode of
depression several years ago. Because my culture super huge stigma of
this type of disease I was clueless about when I was experimenting it.
So, this lasted for about two years; it was awful. Recently, well
let me tell you, to compensate for what I was thinking the first time I tried
to go off that thinking comparing it to something else just to help me to stop
thinking about that specific thought. Time passed and everything was
going great but until recently my mind unconsciously started bringing up
a lot of the thinking I used to compensate for the first thought. That sparked
a lot of guilt and condemnation again. I started to read your book and
it's so refreshing to know more of how my brain works and how I am not my thinking
and so many more you wrote in your book. However, I still feel like I am
dragging but slowly coming up of this second episode.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.0pt;">I am a christian,
and unfortunately, there are not many literature about depression also I
think because of the stigma in the christian community. But now I am
convince that is not only spiritual. We are a fallen human race and
somehow we have been busted in every area since the fall. Of course, I
know I am forgiven by God if I just repent of my sins but I still have to manage
my life here on earth. Now more than ever I am sure that God uses people
like you who have invested time doing lot of research about this topic
and who also has experience the same situation in your own life. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.0pt;">I am
very thankful that people like you write books so other can benefit from your
best input in your own experience. I feel I can Identify with you a lot, that
is why you are the only one I can confide this situation with. My son, who is also in the field of psychology knows about the first
episode but not about this one. He has also helped me a lot. But of course I do feel that you have
more experience and definitely more knowledge to help me just getting through
this stage. Even though I have been reading your book and believe me it
has benefited me greatly, I still have this longing to talk to someone like
you. but I would really
like if I can give you a call to have that connection with someone professional.
I don't have any health insurance so I don't have anyone to talk to in
the professional arena. I will provide my phone number if you could
please reach to me and I would greatly appreciate it from the bottom of my
heart. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.0pt;">Sincerely,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.0pt;">PS. I really hope you
understand my writing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.0pt;">Dear Sincerely,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">Thank you so much for your emaiI. Receiving feedback such as yours is inspiring to me in my work. As for a telephone conversation, I have found over the years that telephone calls are not as
successful as emails. In emails one has to coalesce their thinking into some
kind of question or statement and that is most of the work already done. People often answer their own questions just as well as I could. I will be glad to correspond with you by email. This way anytime you feel
shaky, night or day., you can email me and I will answer you right away. This way
you can count on my friendship as one human being to another. In one area I
know more than you but there are some areas in which you probably know more
than I do. A.B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span><br />
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Thank
you Curtis! It is nice to know that I can learn from you about this
matter. <o:p></o:p></div>
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A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-38938199738940214362017-01-18T12:52:00.001-08:002017-01-18T12:56:57.670-08:00Everyone Should Understand "Projection."<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Everyone should know about the psychological defense mechanism called "projection." I used to
be socially fearful and immature, they call it social anxiety now and proscribe Paxil for
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But the real problem with social anxiety or any feeling of social
alienation is a psychological defense mechanism known as “projection.” It took
me a long time to realize that I was projecting my own sense of coldness on
others when I walked into any party or even a small gathering of my peer group.
They weren’t cold and rejecting, I was cold and rejecting to protect myself
from possible hurt from their coldness and rejection. </div>
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When I understood this I
found I could always find someone to become interested in. I might start slow
with a waiter in a big party and make a few friendly comments to loosen up and
get out of my focus on myself. I found most people were not rejecting and cold. </div>
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The cure for social anxiety is the courage to risk hurt and reach out to
interest yourself in and love other people. Everybody wants love and respect
and we are on the Earth to give it to one another. Wise men say that every
person is fighting a great battle and we never know what secret and heavy
burdens the person next to us is carrying. Let us lighten their burden with
showing that we care about them. Let us be each others’s angels on Earth. <o:p></o:p></div>
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A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-89285374152130102612016-10-31T12:00:00.000-07:002016-10-31T12:03:35.617-07:00All I Feel is Empty Sadness<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">QUESTION:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">HI<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I had emailed you a few
months ago about me starting college and realizing that I wanted to become a
therapist. I started school in august. And it's been going pretty well. I had
better control over my depression and anxiety. I have been seeing someone for
the past year. It's long distance. She lives 5 hours away. But we haven't been
official for the past month. Just slowly trying and seeing how things naturally
grow. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">The other day she told me
about a girl she met who is in an open relationship and that they have a mutual
interest. So she wanted to know if I still wanted to keep things the way they
were for now with us. Free and open but still involved and letting things grow.
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> I love her like no one else I've loved. And so
I said yes that's fine. I'll talk to other people too. But I feel stuck. I
can't pull out of this empty sadness and then I start to overthink and become
almost manic about losing her to this other girl. I try to talk to other people
but I have no interest in anyone but her. We've been best friends for 2 years.
She's younger than me and still trying to figure herself out. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">This has made me lose my
ambition with my social life and it's starting to affect my schooling. I've
tried reading the brain switch book but I can't give it my full attention. I
need help rebalancing my brain basically. And stay focused on what I need to do
in my life. But I do not know where to start. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">ANSWER:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">The first thing to do when
you are in a negative space in life is to head toward something positive. Every
thought you think is either negative or positive. Everybody has great battles
to fight. No one knows when they are going to be thrust on a new and desperate
battlefield of life. It could happen in an instant. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">So never feel resentful of
your own battle by comparing your battle with someone else's life who seems
more fortunate. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">If your friendships are
unrewarding or shaky, it is logical to believe that there is someone else out
there who might make a good friend for you.
It is possible to have an uplift from a conversation with a passing
stranger. That is a positive thought. Look forward to meeting someone that you
don't even yet know. That is a positive thought. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Think not that life is
your enemy but your friend and if you are brave and courageous, you will
approach your own skirmishes by thinking that it may be hard but you will be
the stronger for them. If you have work to do, then do it without waiting for
your life to "get better". Our life only gets better when we become
better persons. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Empty sadness means that
you are concentrating on the negative in your life. If you are sad thinking
about yourself, think about someone else. Wish someone else well. I am now
wishing you well and it expands my own life and sends me in a positive
direction. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">There is always some "next thing" that you can do to improve your life. Some small task that needs to be done. Look around and find one small positive thing to do. The second thing will then present itself. There is always some "next thing" you can to and this is always a good way to start when you feel stuck. Don't hold up your life waiting for some "big problem" to be solves.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Problems are never really
solved. If they can be solved, they are not problems but work. We tend to park
ourselves in what we think are overwhelming problems because do not want to
exercise our courage and take on the day. When we take on our life with a good
attitude, we just grow bigger than our problems and thus transcend them to the
point where they are no longer problems because we have something more positive
on which to focus our attention. Hope this helps. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">A. B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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---<o:p></o:p></div>
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A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-46176157572404279462016-09-07T15:27:00.000-07:002016-09-07T15:27:41.119-07:00I'm Anxious About Upcoming Test<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b>My Question Is:</b><o:p></o:p></div>
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Shortly
I will have final exam for becoming a tourist guide. It is my second time
attending because first time I failed. It can be difficult exam, because as a
guide I will lead small group of people ( including committee professors)
either on the bus or outside.<o:p></o:p></div>
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My
last experience was not so good, because I was so self-focused and I
disliked feeling the stress before my turn. Thanks to you, I understand
that it is mind’s survival mechanism and I know very well to direct my mind
into different direction, using non-emotional and neutral thought. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Anyway,
I am afraid that emotions will prevail again and that I will lose clarity of
mind. Last time on the exam my brain was really excited to perform, I was maybe
too confident and I made some big mistakes. </div>
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For instance, I knew the right
name for mountains ahead of us, but brain told me wrong names and it was only
at the end that somebody told me I made a mistake with names of the mountains.
I was really puzzled, because I was sure I was correct during the
performance. <o:p></o:p></div>
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To
make it short, how can I focus my brain and keep calm before my performance
starts. Usually it gets very wild minutes before I will perform. My heart
starts racing and lots of heat goes in the head. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The
second question is, how to avoid depression that hits afterward, when such
events are finished? Usually I need 2 days to recover and rest. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I
thank you again for this great work you do. Thank you for reply. <o:p></o:p></div>
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My Answer:</b>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">Most
people have social anxiety about speaking in public. Many have test anxiety.
Both can be helped by a deep breath, relaxing the shoulder muscles and focusing
on the task ahead rather than self-focusing on your fear. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">For public
speaking, substitute a pat on the back for yourself instead of frightening
yourself. “You studied, the words will come to you. It’s all right to hesitate
and collect your wits. You can actually pause and look around at the crowd or
the person you are addressing or even say out loud something like, I’m really
happy to be here or some such innocuous phrase. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">For
tests, always use the self-falk “I know this, the answer is coming to me
now.” Or any positive or neutral thought to replace the panic thought—“I don’t
know this, I’m going to fail,” which are not helpful. Hope this helps. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">As
for depression, fear dumps adrenalin into the brain which is very hard on the
metabolic processes and causes the down shift in energy. But fear accepted and
the adrenalin used up in thinking or speaking activity does not have the same
downshift effect. Remember that depression is a thought. It cannot think itself
when you direct your thought process in another direction and refuse to think
the depression. A. B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-79535188062621476422016-08-31T18:31:00.000-07:002016-08-31T18:32:52.772-07:00I Lost the Feeling of Love for my Husband<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://www.blogger.com/profile/03758088802638858923">Unknown</a> has left a new comment on
your post "<a href="http://mobyjane.blogspot.com/2010/03/my-husband-is-mean-and-yells-at-me-im.html">My Husband is Mean and Yells
at Me. I'm being Bull...</a>":
<br />
<br />
Hi,,, I am 10 years married now to my husband, and it's starting to get really
hard for me to endure my husband's attitude,, I have left my family behind to be
with him, and now after 7 years of not seeing them is getting to me.. Anything
that I try to do in a good way for him never satisfies him, instead its always
mean words do degrade me and call me names while screaming so loud the neighbors
hear him.. when he does yell at me he spits because he is talking so loud.. I
forgive him for the way he does things but now I think I am falling in
depression,, <o:p></o:p></div>
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We never
do anything any more and I have lost the feeling of making love, it’s like I am
dead inside... tears are starting to build up in my eyes talking about it.. I
don't know what to do, I am afraid alone,, no help... it is hard I just feel
like leaving, but my heart still clings to him... I just don't know what to
do,, I give him everything and anything he wants but it’s not enough. His aggression
is horrible!!! <br />
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Dear
Friend,<o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">You are living
in a constant state of fear. But that is not your husband’s fault. At least in
this country you can count on your personal freedom so if your husband is
physically abusive, you can call 911. Meanwhile you are totally responsible
once you reach adulthood to take care of yourself, physically, mentally and
spiritually. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">One clue is
that blaming others is the way we avoid the pain of our own fear. Your husband
has the same problem. His own fear is causing him to blame you for whatever is
going wrong or whatever failure he senses about his own life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;"> One of you has to wake up to the fact that no
one is here on earth to take care of you and everyone on the planet is doing
the best that he can at the moment. There is always the possibility of redemption.
You are supposed to take care of yourself and share your life with others. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">Most of us
suffer from repressed fear left over from our childhood. Fear is painful. To
avoid the pain of our own fear we, instead, focus our attention on what others
are doing wrong. And we can always find it in the people around us. Especially in our own family.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">Anything you do
out of fear is not going to be inappropriate to your own life in some way. So
all our action should be, as much as possible, out of love. Since you love your
husband you are probably confusing the issue by thinking that if you give in to
him, it is an act of love when it may, instead, be an act of fear and therefore
have a totally inappropriate outcome. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">Anything you do
out of love is bound to be appropriate to your life in some way. So you must
take care of yourself in these adverse situations with your husband out of your
love of doing the right. you won’t be able to do that unless you can call upon
your courage by acknowledging your fear first. I had the same problem many
years ago and my marriage at that time was very unhappy. I finally got the
message and when he would raise his voice to bully me, or silence me, or
criticize me I would say to myself “How can I take care of myself in this
adverse situation.” My typical response
had been to slink away and get depressed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">After a while
when my husband could no longer bully me because I was no longer impressed with
the inappropriate way he handled his own fear, he was left with his own
outrageous and bullying behavior and I could either walk away, perfectly happy
with myself, or point out to him that I was not impressed that he was so out of
control.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">It is hard work
to be a human being sometimes. But we can’t blame others for our failure to
take care of ourselves. And you can visit your family whenever you want.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">A lot of information
on this topic is on my depression website or on my blog (you are not the only one who is struggling) or in my book DEPRESSION IS A CHOICE.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">I’ll be glad
answer any other questions you have. A.
B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-80944963866671148582016-08-30T13:10:00.001-07:002016-08-30T13:13:47.255-07:00I Refer to Your Book Often<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Dear A.B. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">I met you at
one of your book signings a year or so ago. I have referred back to your book
"Depression is a Choice" many times. I find it a valuable read,
considering the alternative systemized approach of prescription drug solutions
that have NOT enhanced my life. It has been a tough battle and I want to
win-without prescription drugs dragging me down. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">I would like
to surround myself with like minded people. Can you offer any suggestions with
CBT groups or perhaps an up-coming lecture to attend? I want to break out of
this programmed mindset and see things from a different perspective. Thank you
for any positive feedback /suggestions /new directions you might have on this
journey.Thank you again ,<br />
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">A fellow
traveler <br />
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Dear Fellow Traveler,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Thank you for your letter. The main thing to remember
is that anything you do in a proactive way by thinking anything other than a
depressive thought, is heading your mind in the
right direction </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">And if you keep heading in the right direction, since the brain
always follows the direction of its most current dominant thought and you can
make any thought dominant by thinking it over and over, you will ultimately be
victorious. When depression hits, you do the same proactive thinking,<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">You might check into some of the possibilities at the Deepak Chopra Center in Carlsbad, CA. They have many valuable programs and updates.</span></div>
</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-26068890623063439372016-08-18T12:22:00.002-07:002016-08-18T12:28:05.079-07:00Your Work Connects Well with non-dual Eastern Wisdom<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Dear AB<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br />
I read your books some 10 years ago and today I again find so much refreshment
and clarity in what you say. I tried to understand and study non- dual wisdom
from East. I think your work beautifully connects both. The life of a person
and awareness which we all are as one source. The understanding how the brain
works and how one thinks is very important and I think it is like a pre-qualifiaction
if we really want to re-cognize who or what we are in the absolute sense. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">I would like
to ask you, if you also study or learn about the non-dual wisdom (Advaita Vedanta)
or Self Knowledge? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">My second
question is, why are humans so attracted to self centeredness and thinking
about one self-misery is so much easier than thinking a neutral thought? I know
it very well for myself and it looks I am just starting again from the start.
Like you say, it is a good news that our brain has endless capacities for new
neural acitivities. <br />
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">I want to
thank you for your effort you put in through writting and speaking. The video
on your website is amazing and gives us very important message.<br /><br />
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">With love from Europe,<br />
<br /><br />
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Dear With Love from Europe<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Thank you so
much for your letter. I’m happy that my work has been helpful to you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">To answer
your first question: I studied Vedanta under Dr. Alan Anderson of San Diego
State University. This great professor is no longer there but I began to
understand what an unusual teacher he was when I realized that there were three
members of the class that were quantum physicists who had traveled from Los Angeles
to San Diego three days a week for ten years to study under him. They helped
the class understand some of the Eastern religion maxims in terms of quantum physics.
Lately I have been studying the work of Deepak Chopra.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">As to your second question: The
reason we are all so self-centered is based upon our primitive survival instinct,
our flight or fight response, which gives us increased energy in times of
danger and which can also be triggered by other events than real danger. </span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">We
must not forget that the mind is basically a defense mechanism and therefore as
paranoid as a secret service agent looking for something that might go wrong
when the President is traveling.</span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"> It is our default mechanism when we are not engaged in
other on- purpose thinking activities.When we allow ourselves to slip into
accidental rather than on-purpose thinking we can easily trigger the
fight-or-flight response because it is always turned on and ready to defend us.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"> A. B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-80623940575221755342016-06-10T13:12:00.001-07:002016-06-10T13:12:59.281-07:00Difficulty Shouldn't be the Test <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br />
Whether or not you do something should not depend on how difficult it is but rather on whether it is to your good or not. Perhaps I derived this idea from the observance of how easy it is to fall into things that are not to our good.<br />
<br />
Brainswitching is in this category. It is extraordinarily difficult to do, even though it is simple. It is difficult to do because depression and anxiety are so easy to fall into and once we fall into them it is just so much easier to stay there than to exert ourselves to get out of them, the law of enertia working against us.<br />
<br />
So the first thing we should do is to put the law of intertia to work for us instead of against us (a body at rest tends to stay at rest). We are resting (albeit uncomfortably) in our anxiety or depression. We need to move out of it. It is difficult, yes. And anyting difficult always requires our courage.<br />
<br />
(a body in motion tends to stay in motion)</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-74024187934968195592016-06-10T13:09:00.006-07:002016-06-10T13:12:07.794-07:00I Need Your Help Again<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>QUESTION:<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I needed to connect with you
once again. I am down and I have your tools. Everything is helping that you so
graciously guided me through. I had many years of personal empowerment from
your support. But I have hit another bump in the road where I feel over whelmed
and lost. I would like to connect by email or phone with you to share what I am
now facing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I am looking to re-ground
myself and I need to get my footing. My home is now too big for me to manage so
I am selling it. My dog has been ill. I would like to stop my suffering about
his suffering. As I am writing to you he just threw up. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><b>RESPONSE:</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">It is easier to connect via
email.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><b>QUESTION:<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Thank you for getting back to
me. I am keeping a journal and it is helping some. But each day I wake up
feeling like I cannot go on. Each day it is very different, never the same
fears or worries of depression. I have never felt bad in the morning before--this
is new. I fear that my brain is drying up and because of that there is no hope.
That might be true but me worried about that happening is only hastening the
brain loss. Well there it is. Today in a nut shell. Thank you for listening. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">My aging is taking my full
attention. I want to get back to my earlier feeling of well-being and I know it
is in me to do it but it is not happening. I am under the weather. I am either
depressed or fearful and up tight. What do you think?<br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Warmly and
appreciated,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>ANSWER:</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">All of us have fearful moments. If we are worried about brain
loss, we should remember that the brain has the capacity for neuroplasticity,
which means that the brain can produce new neurons and neural patterns
indefinitely even in old age. However we have to exercise our brain just the
way we do the rest of our body. Anything new helps to renew the production of
neurons in our brain. If you’ve never done crosswords before, now it the time
to start doing them. If you’ve never played card games before, now is the time
to start doing them. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">For instance, I have just taken up the piano which is very
difficult for me. When I feel discouraged that it is hard to learn something,
then I remember, good then this is really going to help improve my brain. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">And if I let my fear escalate into a panic attack I put on my
thinking brakes immediately and turn from thoughts about how afraid I am to
some nursery rhyme or some inspirational poem. I have committed many poems to
memory just so I have something to think about instead of my fear. For instance
those I have learned include the 23<sup>rd</sup> Psalm, the Gettysburg Address,
Desiderata, IF by Rudyard Kipling, Crossing the Bar by Tennyson, Milton’s
sonnet on his blindness and Invictus. The next thing I’m going to memorize is
the Ten Paradoxical Commandments by Kent Keith. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">And I try to remember that I am not alone. There is always
someone, some human being that I can connect with in some small way, say hello
to--even if it’s only the person standing next to me in the Post Office. We
should not allow negative and downer thinking. As soon as we catch ourselves
doing it, we can chose another thought and some more positive action, no matter
how humble.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">A. B. Curtiss</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>THANK YOU</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Thank you
for your leads. I will try crossword puzzles. I also do drawings. I am going to
start the piano. Staying busy also helps me. I still use <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">‘Green Frog.”
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 4.5pt; tab-stops: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I have my
business and a couple are moving into my house and that is bringing up my mood.
I also have been listening to the 4 agreements. I want to be better but just
when things are getting better for sure,then I cast my eyes on things in the
far off future and loose all my feelings in my fingers and legs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 4.5pt; tab-stops: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Or I notice
an cut on my finger and then see my aging bringing me more and more challenges.
I’ve just got to find a way to be a better person for myself in this aging
process. I want to feel loved, safe and secure and that I can handle suffering
like my mother did</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">. I need a community of friends that are going through the
same thing that are helping each other to stay strong. <br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I must admit
that I have times I feel really good but I see that these times come from
events outside of myself. I want to find peace and comfort from just being
alive. I want my comfort to come from inside me like Eckhart Tolle <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 4.5pt; tab-stops: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">When asked
what life is; a great sage said that life is like the fragrance of jasmine
carried on the spring breeze. I want that kind of awareness. Then I want to be
able to handle my emotiond so I can least retutn to a neutral state of conciousness. I want neutral
to be enough if that is all I can reach. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 4.5pt; tab-stops: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I do not
want to need a party. When I freak out, I want to be able to calm myself.<br />
I do not want my fear to take me to depression because I cannot handle my fear.
<br />
I want to feel my healing growing inside of me rather than the decaying. I want
to respect myself.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I have found
that listing wants helps me. Thank you for giving me things that really
work. One think I know it is that it is... dealing with it works better than
not. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b>FINAL COMMENT:</b><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Sounds like you are headed
down the right track. Just remember that when you are going in the wrong
direction the smallest positive thing you can do turns you 180 degrees in the
right direction. A small positive action or thought has great power. It’s not
the greatness of the thought or action that matters. A simple acknowledgment of
your intent to do better is enough.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> “I’m doing my very best today, even though it
seems I haven’t accomplished much. I have taken a step in the right direction.
Tomorrow I may take two steps forward or even backward. No matter, right now I
am intending to be better. And I I will concentrate on my intention, not my
fear.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">A.B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-8788295665071958202016-05-04T21:44:00.003-07:002016-05-04T21:44:47.317-07:00I'd like to Become a Therapist <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">QUESTION<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">;<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I
have been suffering from anxiety and depression. And reading your book is
really helping me understand the whole thinking pattern. And with me I need to
understand something before I can change it. If that makes sense. I am in my
30s with 2 young kids. I work but it's not my passion. I want to do something I
love rather than something I know. A few years ago I was thinking about
becoming a therapist. But I put it off and dealt with life’s events.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">And
recently I've been doing a lot of reading and reflecting, realizing that
becoming a therapist feels like my calling. It's something I would love doing
rather than just to have a job. Ever since I can remember I've enjoyed helping
others. I'm not sure what kind of therapist I want to become. How did you come
to choose to become a psychotherapy?<br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--></span><span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt;">ANSWER:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt;">Thanks for your
letter. My becoming a therapist was totally coincidental. I was taking a friend
to SDSU trying to get her interested in some course of study to get her mind
off her recent divorce. I was behind her in line and looking at the list of
courses when I realized the woman at the counter was asking me what course I
was interested in. Thinking this was merely idle conversation I answered I was
kind of interested in the counseling education course. “Oh, that’s closed,” she
said. “Oh that’s okay,” I said. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt;">And I thought
of my best friend in high school who became a biofeedback counselor and realized
I had been slightly envious but never before had given a thought that I myself could aspire to such a
lofty calling. The clerk said to me then “But you could take it on an at-risk
basis and hope to get into the program after the semester ends. “Fine,” said I,
“I’ve been at risk all my life.” So, on a whim I just signed up then and there.
And that’s how I became a therapist. To become an MFT (marriage family
counselor) is time intensive. You need at least 1000 hours of practice (usually unpaid) before you
can even take the license exam. (You’ll have to check on that figure it may be
as much as 3,000 hours. I don’t remember for sure.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt;">And there are
many different kinds of therapists. Hypnotherapists, and Spiritual therapists besides the marriage
family (MFT). You can get a degree on line. Of if you belong to a church you
could become a “lay counselor.” On the
other hand, some people simply develop a helpful expertise, write a book and
give lectures without any official designation. Read Dale Carnegie’s book <b>How to Make Friends and Influence People.</b>
He started out by doing small free talks at the YWCA and his course in now known
throughout the world. Some people just start by writing a helpful blog and
reach out to help people that way. Some people begin by doing Tarot readings
for people in some kind of psychic community like Elfin Forest. Good luck on
your path. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt;">You might find
Deepak Chopra’s book <b>The Essential
Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire</b> helpful in finding out what your next
step might be. It’s less than 150 pages. A. B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-56750993697585639612016-04-01T08:59:00.000-07:002016-04-01T08:59:41.871-07:00Fear I am Losing Control<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="background: white;">
<b><span style="font-size: 14pt;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<b><span style="font-size: 14pt;">QUESTION:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;">Hi
Curtiss, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;">Hope you
keeping well, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;">These
days losing control of my thinking, and seeking to raise the level of
positiveness biased to sexual thoughts and behave through face expressions
and eye gestures because of the repressed fear causing losing control. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;">Need to
get out from this fall. I have been trying to get out from this from the last
few days. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;">is Unbalanced
brain chemistry causes these symptoms. since deep fear was holding me for
few weeks Thanks Curtiss <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div style="background: white;">
<b><span style="font-size: 14pt;">ANSWER:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt;">Remember that
will is destiny, biology is not destiny.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt;">There is
nothing more powerful than the human will to do better and we can always think
a better thought. A better thought will change our brain chemistry for the
better. Just say to yourself, I’m doing better and better. Then choose some
mantra and meditate on that to keep the more destructive thoughts from
bothering you. When fear comes, acknowledge it, accept it and then the fear
will diminish and you can move beyond it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt;">As for fear of
losing control you can use cognitive behavioral thinking for this. Here’s how I cured myself of
claustrophobia which appears in my book <i>Depression
is a Choice</i>. Ask yourself what,
exactly are you afraid you will do physically with your body. Once you decide
what that is, you can, at the same time, commit to the decision that you will not do that. Then
what is left is just the fear again which you can accept, let it finish and
move on. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt;">Here’s the
excerpt from my book: <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I recently took a trip during which my regular method
of handling claustrophobia utterly failed. I have been successful with short
trips, but this was a six-hour flight to Hawaii and I was stuck in the center
of five seats on a fully loaded plane. At first I concentrated on my book, but
little doubts kept creeping into my concentration until I started to panic.
Every atom of my body was screaming, I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE NOW!!! I forced
myself to check that the seat-belt sign had been turned off, I excused myself
by the other two passengers, and I BOLTED into the aisle. SAVED! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I walked up and down for a while and did not have the
courage to return to my seat. They served breakfast and though I was hungry, I
still couldn’t sit down. I was miserable. My back started to hurt and so I sat
down on the floor in the only available space I could find, which was near the
lavatories. But the smell was terrible and people started giving me odd and
annoyed looks for which I could hardly blame them. There were dozens of people
perfectly fine in their seats. I was the only nut-case sitting down on the
dirty floor where people were having to step over me. I began to be ashamed to
behave so ignominiously.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">When the aisles were cleared from breakfast, I walked
up and down for a while longer and then I tried to sit in the pull-down
stewardess seat but I was told it was against regulations. My back was starting
to hurt again from standing and I started to think about my situation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I guessed I could stand up for another three hours.
But what kind of a fake was I that I was writing a book about brainswitching
and I couldn’t even control my own claustrophobia? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I began to study my situation, earnestly, in terms of
what was the fear about. Not <i>why </i>was I afraid but <i>what, </i>exactly,
was I afraid of? I thought that I could control myself long enough to belt
myself in for a landing, but I wanted to do better than that if I could. I
didn’t want to be a phony. Was I going to put my money where my mouth was or
what?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I didn’t try to search for anything rational. I knew
that my terror was totally irrational. My former success with claustrophobia, I
now realized, was limited. I could handle short flights in a three-seat flying
situation. In a crowded auto I learned that I could control my panic if I could
sit on the very edge of the seat or someone’s lap, where my arms and legs were
not confined, and lean into the space between the two front seats. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Luckily I am not a large person, so I could usually
maneuver a workable position. But this was the middle seat of five, in a
totally full airplane and I was terrified. Over the years I had just naturally
avoided situations which were this uncomfortable. I was able to get aisle seats
in airplanes. But not this time. I had received my comeuppance.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I was thinking about all these things while I was
studying my situation on the plane. What exactly was I afraid would happen if I
sat back down in the middle of those crowded seats? <i>That I would flail my arms around and
scream</i>! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Well, I thought, that is <i>just behavior</i>, isn’t
it, and I’m sure I can control my behavior so that I do not do that. Yes, I
decided, I could depend upon my earnest commitment to not flail my arms around
or scream. So what did that leave? <i>The
terror</i>. Yes, I could do nothing to prevent the terror. I would feel like I was dying. I would feel like I
couldn’t breathe. Well, I thought, that is all <i>just feeling</i>, isn’t it? I
just have to stand the physical pain of that terror. <i>I have to control my
behavior and just feel the terror</i>, just sit there quietly, even if I pass
out, or <i>die</i> if that is my fate. I decided I could do that.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I sat back down, buckled myself in and prepared to
feel the most absolute terror of my life. I opened myself up to whatever pain
would come. I was absolutely determined to bear the most unimaginably painful
feelings, whatever they were. The most amazing thing happened. No terror came.
Not even the smallest tinge of it. I completed the rest of the flight in
complete comfort. Now and then I invited the pain and terror if it wanted to
come. But it never did.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I think the whole key was to separate the gestalt of
panic into its plain, more user-friendly concomitants of behavior and feeling.
Looking at the separate parts of my panic gave me a clue as to how to proceed.
I saw the panic in terms of tasks to accomplish, rather than fear to succumb
to. I could see that, although it might be difficult and painful, it was
possible for me to control my behavior and keep myself from screaming or
flailing my arms around. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">And it was possible to bear any pain that my feelings
were going to inflict upon me. After all, they were<i> my</i> feelings, weren’t
they? What could my own feelings <i>do to me</i>, really. In two weeks, I would
have to return from Hawaii. I determined to seek out the terror again and see
what more work I had to do, or what new tortures my terror would teach me. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">On my return trip, I found I had been given an aisle
seat and I was tempted to let it go at that. But because I felt obligated to
finish this story for my book, <i>however it turned out</i>. I told the clerk I was working on my
claustrophobia so would she please give me the worst crowded-up inside seat she
could. Again I settled down quite prepared to feel the terror NO MATTER WHAT! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">In the beginning I got just a few tendrils of panic
and again I opened myself up to whatever horror would be visited upon me. The
tendrils of panic just faded out to nothing. I felt perfectly comfortable the
whole trip. We can all make our life into something immensely satisfying
regardless of the circumstances of it. With the earnest desire to do so.
Anybody can do it with a little practice. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt;">A. B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-79238809200041392182016-03-21T09:11:00.003-07:002016-03-21T09:12:28.469-07:00 I'm Always Going Back to Square One<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 14pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 14pt;">QUERY:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 14pt;">It seems I have to go back to the basic tools which I
learnt to get out for sometimes which I started from yesterday. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 14pt;">RESPONSE:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">It’s true for all of us.
We need to start all over every day. Start with meditation, gratitude that we
are alive and get up and do our best each moment. When we fail one moment, we
regroup, gather our wits and begin again with the next moment. This is the
great gift of life. Every moment can be a new beginning. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">A. B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-61237584539591752902016-03-16T15:02:00.000-07:002016-03-16T15:02:06.759-07:00I am Fearful at Work<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">QUESTION:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Two months before I noticed one of the work mates was acting
unethical practices to myself, caused me to have deep fear for some days since
it was first time I see such actions. I went to complain to my boss about this
guy and my needs from him to support me to transfer the work mate to another
place which did happen by the boss. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">I started to fear the boss might one day tell about this story
since me and the work mate are from same country and he might take this
advantages. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">I am trying to strengthen myself and I am on Vacation for few days
just to relax.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">My fear affects my work day and family as well. Really have hard
time controlling my fear.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">ANSWER:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Meditation
would help you in this situation. When you feel the fear, decide to look at the
fearful situation in a different way. Not through the eyes of fear but in a
more meditative way, as if you are simply the observer rather than the
sufferer. It takes a lot of courage but it makes you a stronger person. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Here is a
helpful visualization you can use. Remember that fear is always about the
future, which could really be all right. You can decide to put the fear in a
mental box and close it so it doesn’t bother you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">You must avoid
making yourself sick over something in the future. Decide that you are “all
right in this moment”. Say to yourself “at this present moment I am safe.”
Always pull back from negative thoughts about the future to the present moment
where we are always safe. A. B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-3640151890302825702016-03-10T13:27:00.001-08:002016-03-10T13:27:46.692-08:00Beat the Zika Virus<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="background: white; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></b>
<b><span style="background: white; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">How to Beat the Zika Virus<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="background: white; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;">By A.B.
Curtiss</span></b><b><span style="background: white; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="background: white; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;">Suppose
the </span><span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;">daytime-active<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aedes" title="Aedes"><i><span style="color: #0b0080; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;">Aedes</span></i></a><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;"> </span></span><span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;">mosquitoes that comes from
the Zika Forest of Uganda wouldn’t bite you? In that case you would never have
to worry about getting the Zika virus. Right now a lot of people are worried
they might get bitten. Because the only
cure at the moment for contracting this virus and getting the fever symptoms
is--rest. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;">The symptoms themselves are not terribly
dangerous for most of us. Even if you get it, you may not even be aware that
you have the virus. It causes only a mild fever which is gone in a few days.
But if you are in the early stages of pregnancy, there is every reason to be
greatly concerned.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;">The Zika Virus has been found to cause symptoms
in pregnant women which are associated with intrauterine growth restriction
which can include abnormal brain development in the developing fetus through
mother-to-child-transmission. This may result in a miscarriage.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;">Or it may result in microcephaly where the
baby’s head is smaller than normal, due to abnormal brain development</span>.
Again, there is no cure for this. No pill you can take. No shot you can get. No vaccine yet to prevent
contracting the symptoms.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So far, the only suggestion from the health community is
that if you are pregnant or considering becoming pregnant, you should avoid
going to places where the mosquitoes are. That’s not terribly helpful, is it?
Especially if you live in Florida, which has already experienced the presence
of these nasty creatures. You are not going to want to move to Alaska, right?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Okay. So what reasonable precaution can you take? Here is a
better suggestion than avoiding the mosquitos. <i>Get the mosquitos to avoid you.</i> That’s right. This is perfectly
possible and I can’t imagine why all the doctors and clinics are not getting
out the word and suggesting it. There is a natural remedy in a simple homeopathic
solution made up of pure water and 3 essential oils. Not harmful to pregnant
women or young children. The solution is:<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
For each 1
ounce of pure water add:<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
1 drop lemon
essential oil (any brand essential oil)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
1 drop
lemongrass essential oil (any brand essential oil)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
1 drop R.C.
(Young Living Essential oil or any brand R.C. essential oil—a combination of
several Eucalyptus oils)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
I usually
make 16 ounces at a time. This means you add 16 drops of each oil to 16 ounces
in pitcher of pure water and then pour into a spray bottle. I once had a
terrible flea and gnat problem where I had to seek professional help because my
pregnant grand-daughter was allergic to any insect bites. No more. We sprayed it on the dogs. We sprayed it on us, including our hair.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
This
solution totally cured my flea problem and eye gnat and mosquito problem for
when I work outside. If I lived in Florida, I would use this several times a
day to make sure I’m not a target for mosquitos. Periodically when insects are
prevalent, I use it several times a day here in San Diego. Don’t forget to use
it on your hair as well. This is totally homeopathic, simple, easy and besides all
that, it makes both me and my two German shepherds dogs smell good.<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-55887547336331301742016-02-28T07:44:00.001-08:002016-02-28T07:44:23.099-08:00Jealousy is Repressed Fear<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<b><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<b><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<b><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">QUESTION:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Hello Curtiss, Hope you
keeping well, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">I am getting Progress
and more control over depression. My query is that how to relieve negative
energy from our mind. sever negative jealousy shows in my
face when communication with people about their good things. It
holds my feelings back without further communications. How this related
with negative energy. OR is it connected with repressed fear. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Always Thanks
Curtiss for support.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<b><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">ANSWER:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Again let me congratulate you on your progress with English. And yes, you are right about jealousy being connected to repressed fear.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif;">Being
jealous of others is the same thing as being angry with others. We are only
angry and jealous when we are seeing the world through our own fear. Jealousy
is more about our own fear than anything else. When we deal with the world
though a haze of fear it is not the same as seeing the world through the eyes
of love. Usually we are full of a lot of repressed fear left over from
childhood unless we start to make an effort to get rid of our old repressed
fear. Read Chapter 10 in the book Depression is a Choice. I know you have the book.
A famous psychiatrist once said “Love is Getting Rid of Fear.” For when you
work through your fear, love is what you are left with.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-7162404449051019872016-02-26T09:19:00.001-08:002016-02-26T09:19:23.265-08:00Need Help with PTSD<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">QUESTION:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Hi A.B. Curtis,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> I’ve read and love your books and wanted to
say thank you for all the great information. I was wondering what your
take is on PTSD and how to deal with it or treat it. I'm also thinking
about seeing a therapist for help with a dysfunctional relationship I'm in, and
with getting my life more organized, what type of therapy would you
recommend and what types to avoid. Thank you<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">RESPONSE:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">PTSD is a problem with brain chemistry in that one cannot get
out of the fight or flight response and therefore suffers with chronic anxiety. Another good book for chronic anxiety is by Dr. Claire Weekes called HOPE AND HELP FOR YOUR NERVES. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">As far as relationship problems. iF you are not dysfunctional yourself, you
cannot be in a dysfunctional relationship. Once you get yourself functional you
will be able to help others. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">The problem today is that all the institutions that used to
support functional relationships have disappeared. The functional unit of any
society is the family. When that is downgraded, we are all adrift and don’t
know where the heck we are or where we are going or why. It’s not just you, who
are searching for some kind of sanity. This whole culture is. You are
definitely not alone. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt;">Read some books by Wayne Dyer, Deepak Chopra. Just keep looking
for higher ground. I would also suggest meditation. Hope this helps some. If
you have specific questions about specific interactions I can help with that.
We have to start small and build on that. A. B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-15349821592978071172016-02-23T15:41:00.006-08:002016-02-23T15:41:57.600-08:00Love Your Book DRAGONS GUARD THE ZOO<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif;">LETTER
TO AUTHOR:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif;">Hello!
I live in Carlsbad, California and I have been writing picture books for the
last couple of years, and so far have not been published. I make it my habit to
read a children's book every night--mostly "random pulls" from the Children's
library.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif;">A
couple of days ago I began reading Dragons Guard the Zoo. I am crazy for
poetry--and I can't tell you how much I am enjoying your book! I wish you had
been a family member of mine! What a wonderful gift you have given your
children and grandchildren! I will intentionally look for your other books at
the library now. (:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif;">RESPONSE
TO LETTER:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif;">Thank
you so much. It is letters like yours that make writing such a rewarding
experience for me. A. B. Curtiss<br />
<br />
<br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--></span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-41831129763179662932016-02-21T07:44:00.002-08:002016-02-21T07:44:38.934-08:00May I have your Permission<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
REQUEST</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My eldest daughter and I met you in San Diago Zoo some years
back when you signed a copy of in the company of bears to her from
the author. I have since those many years passed been asked to read in the
company of bears to second grade class.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I myself an published recording artist of Instrumental Music
understand copyright covers any reproduction, Furthermore, I know to request of
the author permission to read this book to a class of students as it is my copy
not property I own. Finally, I will not be accepting compensation in any way.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Therefore, I humbly ask your permission Miss AB to read In
The Company of Bears to my daughter's class, please?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
RESPONSE</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Of course you have my permission to read In the Comany of Bears to your daughter's class with my blessings. A. B. Curtiss</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-8514655098884861552016-02-19T12:55:00.002-08:002016-02-19T12:55:55.627-08:00How do you Do what Needs to be Done?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<b> Human Motivation<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">How can you face the hard things in
life?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">First, call on the best that is in you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">And boldly make a start.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">Shake off the easy cringe of fear <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">Step forth with a willing heart. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">Resolve to accomplish what needs to be
done<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">There is help for the one who will ask.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">Call on your courage<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">Gather your tools<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">And present yourself to the task.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 8.0pt;">A.B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
</div>
A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-48090770648080996902016-02-12T12:42:00.003-08:002016-02-12T12:46:29.192-08:00Your Information Would be Helpful for my Friend<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="color: #222222; font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br />MESSAGE:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br />
I have your book DEPRESSION IS A CHOICE and had some old printouts that are not
clear from you older website that were exercises; 10 don't etc. I want to share
them with a friend who was physically abused as a child and she is on lots of
drugs and is the mother of two toddlers, who have some physical and
emotional issues I believe may be related to all the drugs she has taken over
the years.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="color: #222222; font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif;">RESPONSE:</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif;">You
can still print out that information from my new website </span><a href="http://www.abcurtiss.com/" style="font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif;">www.abcurtiss.com</a><span style="color: #222222; font-family: "helvetica" , sans-serif;">. Just click on DEPRESSION at the top and scroll down to depressionisachoice.com</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-18923996405794227642016-02-05T17:02:00.003-08:002016-02-05T17:02:56.725-08:00I get Depressed from Eating Some Foods<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b><span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif;">QUESTION:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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</span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Hi A.B. Whenever I ingest milk, eggs, or turkey, I develop very
severe depression. After I stop these foods, it will take my body 72 hours to
normalize my mood. You claim that thought leads to mood impairment. I agree
with you if you're talking about reactive depression. However, how do you
explain the depression I have, which is due to an inflammatory reaction? BTW, I
do get other symptoms, such as going to the bathroom constantly, burping, etc.,
and sometimes extreme back pains.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif;">ANSWER:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">All depression is caused by a chemical
imbalance in the brain. The chemical imbalance can be caused by foods, hormones
or by accidentally triggering the flight or fight response with fearful or
accidental anxious thinking when there is no reason to be alarmed. With
accidental thinking, stress chemicals not being dissipated in action (which
would dissipate them) are very hard on the metabolic system causing the body energy
to go way down. A. B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-46795848935853460462016-01-29T18:28:00.000-08:002016-01-29T22:59:15.006-08:00Do Other People Like You?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="color: #29303b; font-family: "georgia" , serif; font-size: 10.0pt;">My
webmaster gave me this great quote from Dale Carnegie. She was telling me how
important it is in my website to show things to people that will interest them
rather than trying to get them interested in what I'm doing.<br />
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Here's the quote: "I can do more business in two months by being
interested in other people than I can in two years by trying to get other
people interested in me."<br />
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This is really quite profound when you think about it. Not just a useful idea
to increase business. Remembering this quote and putting it to practical use
can make a positive change in your whole life. There are few people to whom the whole world just naturally gravitates. The rest of us must make some kind of effort to connect with others.<br />
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When we are trying to get people interested in us it's usually out of some kind
of anxiety that we want to be well thought of. We may even be uptight without
even knowing it. Whereas when we put our energy into being interested in other
people we can relax a little. We are connecting with them not by trying to look
good ourselves, but wanting to find out something about them. Showing them not
that <i>we</i> should be important to them
but that <i>they </i>are already important
to us.<br />
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And in our listening to the stories of others we learn about them. They become
more human to us. We find we like them better than when we didn't know anything
about them. We find common ground. They become a fellow traveler on our path of
life. And when we like them better, guess what happens? Then they like us better. It's quite magical.<br /></span><br />
<span style="color: #29303b; font-family: "georgia" , serif; font-size: 10.0pt;">So, let's not forget, in our haste to tell our own story, that listening to someone else can be
far more rewarding than listening to ourselves. For both of us. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6695087504686401302.post-10632655106019987162016-01-27T07:20:00.001-08:002016-01-27T07:21:58.247-08:00Connecting With Others in Positive Way<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">Dear Ms,Curtiss, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">I have some thing really hurts the feeling well. I have a work mate
which i have competitions for long time in politics. Trying to love to avoid
hate feeling which show in face expressions in front of him to be faded.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">Pls accept sharing feelings with you. I really need to shake my
heart to have a clear love one.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">Thanks Curtiss <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">Rudolf Steiner said that for us to reach higher levels
of being in our own lives we should begin by a path of veneration. Instead of
criticizing the person in front of us, enter lovingly into his merits as a
human being and child of the universe as are we ourselves. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">It is not so hard if you truly make the decision to
venerate all life as sacred. Even the most brutal of men still have, within
them, the possibility of redemption. A. B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">Dear Curtiss, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">These days I tried to connect my soul with my partners soul. It
seems very annoying practice to both partners soul and I want to get rid of
this negative practice. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">Sometimes bad impression can come when I meet people from first
time due to this practice. Deep communications between souls make me tired when
there is negative thinking and negative energy which might be delivered easily
to the next partners and they would start to hate this type of feelings
and soul communications. Maybe fear from this practice is there too which
affect cheerfulness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">Ms Curtiss, Pls can you advise on this types of communications.
Loving and respect can help to change this but fear might be still there.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">I really wants to stop this type of practice. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">I’m not sure what you mean by trying to connect with
your partner’s soul. By your partner do you mean your wife? I thought I
remembered that you were married and had a son? Is that right? The way to
connect with anyone is to have a feeling of reverence for that person’s merits
so that you are in a state of veneration for that person. Veneration is holding
someone in highest regard. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">Dear Curtiss,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">I meant all people around including my wife are feeling my negative energy and keeps me worried. Maybe it is fear <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Yes, I have son 9 years old and daughter 5 years . They are doing
great and thanks Curtiss to ask about family <o:p></o:p></div>
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My wife told me a story about one lady works with her and suffer
from depression, this lady has full negativity and no love. Employees do
not like to communicate with her because of this. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Worried came to me due to this story which affect mine too,
started thinking how souls communicate and how they get in touch from
first impression. My wife felt this might affect myself due to that story.<o:p></o:p></div>
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But will accept this fear and will continue
cheerful life <o:p></o:p></div>
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hanks Curtiss for understanding and supporting <o:p></o:p></div>
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Regards, <o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">While you are in their presence, think of them instead
of thinking about yourself and how well you are connecting with them. Just
focus you interest on the merits of that person don’t think about your own
merits or faults. Self-focusing is a connection breaker. If your fear intrudes
upon your attempt to connect simply notice it and allow the fear to flow. It is
all right to be afraid. Try to relax into your own fear and instead of focusing
on it, focus instead on the merits of the other person. A. B. Curtiss<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">Dear Curtiss, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">Thanks Curtiss for all the support you made to us which create big
life changing towards positiveness and understanding how we treat our soul to
help it to get out from deep depression .<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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A. .B. Curtisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01061784337021208166noreply@blogger.com0