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Sunday, February 14, 2010

I learned How to Get out of Depression and Shyness from Your Book

Dear Curtiss

I do not know how to thank you for the book I am reading--Brain Switch out of Depression. My life has changed since I started reading the book four years ago.

I understand now what depression is and why I felt depressed.

I used to be shy whole my life, and self focused among people when there were meeting or conversation with many people at once

Now I can talk and participate with people without self focus for most of the time.

I was feeling depressed for almost 15 years before I read your book. The best thing for me is the ways in the book to recognize depression.

My brother suffers the same symptoms and is also self focused. I am Arabic native speaker and I want to ask you if there is an Arabic translated book

All the best, F. K.

Dear F. K.

Thank you for your letter. I’m glad my book has been helpful to you. I’m sorry but there is no Arabic translation of the book. It is translated now in Russia, Japan, Lithuania, and Estonia, and my book Depression is a Choice is translated in Portugal. If you have any questions I will be glad to answer them. A. B. Curtiss

Dear Curtiss:

I was feeling great and smart in school and can remember everything easily when I started reading the book for about one to two months. But in later time I felt bad from time to another and hard to focus.

I think the more new exercises I read, the better. Maybe I need to read more new exercises. I do not know should I apply for graduate school because of this situation or not.

I have a child two years old seems have the same symptoms. what should I do in this case?

All the best

Dear F. K.

Just because you know how to do something isn't the same thing as doing it, over and over, until you make new neural patterns in your brain that you can count on. Just because you know how to exercise isn't the same thing as exercising every day. Now that you know some mind exercises which are good for depression you must use them over and over every time you get that little downer hint of depression until it becomes second nature. You don't wait to use the little exercises until you feel really depressed. You use the little exercises when you have just the smallest passing anxious thoughts, when you start worrying about little things, when you find yourself feeling annoyed or bored, or any negative thinking whatsoever. If you do this, and get better and better at catching yourself in the negative, then depression won't have a chance to get going.

Start being more aware of negative moods and use the exercises then. They work for heavy depression too, but catching depression earlier and earlier means you don't spend most of your life in the "grey" area, where you aren't horribly depressed but you don't feel real good about yourself either. You want to use the exercises to move you from "grey" to more productive thinking and activity which promotes good feelings of achievement and connection where you feel strong and capable instead of weak and incompetent.

A child of two isn't supposed to be able to concentrate on things. They develop habits of concentration over the next few years. If they seem unhappy, that means that they are being ignored and left to themselves too much without one one one inter-action with another adult. They should be distracted out of moods by you engaging with them in fun activities for them.

Two-year olds should be constantly in touch with a loving adult who is paying attention to them. Too much television time will rewire their brains and make them passive and uninterested in real life because they don't know how to interact, they have become passive. Passivity leads to "gray" area kinds of thinking. Even two-year olds need active, engaging, stimulating play ("work") which they can prove to themselves they know something, or can do something so they feel good about themselves and start to feel strong and capable. A. B. Curtiss

Dear Curtiss

My child two years old child I noticed him easily respond to negative words like when I say "NO," he gets upset. Also, he can easily repeat it.

"NO" is the first word he said. I started to avoid saying NO or any negative word to him because it stimulates his negative emotions easily.

And I noticed him that it’s hard for him to repeat "I love you" or any strong positive words.

I am starting to let him repeat and say "I love you," and I told his babysitter to start avoid saying any negative words to him. She said my baby is very sensitive sometimes, and anxious.

I think saying positive words will help him a lot by saying reasons of why he should avoid mistakes instead of saying "NO" or "STOP"

All the best.

Dear F. K.

Yes, the way to raise a fearful child is to constantly tell him STOP or NO. A child this young should be gently distracted from dangerous things and dangerous behavior. And you are right to change all the negatives into positives. Nothing good comes from the negative. The negative is just the absence of the positive. A. B. Curtiss

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