Once you start to see how powerful a force is a thought, and even pain is a thought, you can see how fearful, anxious thoughts need to be replaced. We can't kill these thoughts as an act of will when they come. But we can learn, as an act of will, to turn away from them and replace them with another thought. I am learning to replace my fearful thoughts with other thoughts and if I flounder for something to think I can always grab for "day by day, in every way I am getting better and better." Just thinking the thought over and over repetitiously helps to calm me down. I also close my eyes and relax my body, which is always tense lately. So I relax it all day long. I'm getting better and better at relaxing, and taking a deep breath and relaxing. And I sometimes think the cheerful thought that my feet no longer sweat. Hooray for the little triumphs.
I am due to go to a reception tonight where my husband and I are hosts. I will only entertain thoughts that "I will be fine." "I can do this." Also I'm starting to imagine people asking me how I am doing and I imagine myself saying "I'm doing great." "Better and better every day." I understand how important it is to immediately turn away from entertaining any downer thoughts.whatsoever.
And here's another triumph for me. I was driving yesterday with my husband and he stopped for gas. My husband has always kept a record of his gas mileage starting with the first car he ever owned. I have always found this terribly annoying and I would grudgingly hand him his notebook with the idea that it was "such a waste of time and effort for nothing."
But not yesterday. I got out the book without his prompting and thought to myself "I love this." I don't know why but I love this." And it has become one of my cheerful things to think about. Strange, but wonderful. A gift of grace and at this moment, my heart is filled with gratitude and love just thinking about that moment. A. B. Curtiss