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Tuesday, November 9, 2010

What Seems Impossible Today May be Possible Tomorrow

Dear AB,

I just don't have the confidence to face work anymore.... or put myself through the pain --- sure, its probably nothing compared to Viktor Frankl -- But I cannot be that strong like you or him.   Everything you say makes sense theoretically but practically it's very challenging.

I am so tempted to give up on work ---- I haven't given it much time to think about my next move -- I really have no energy left after work - even on weekends. I know there are no other positions, or with my record of sick leave and recent poor performance they would not accommodate for me, I’m pretty sure.  I'm calling in sick today.  I know you say it's just a chemical imbalance, but until I’m able to perfect it, I feel I’ve reached that limit point.   I'm sorry to disappoint you despite all your help, support and encouragements.   Kindest regards,  Y

Dear Y__________

What seems like impossible today may change and be possible tomorrow. There is always the possibility of some small positive light that will suddenly show itself and we may follow it. Anything productive, anything positive, no matter how small a victory. Take heart from your victories no matter how small. You took a shower? That's a start. You brushed your teeth. Good for you. You made your bed. Wonderful. Just keep  going in that direction, give yourself credit for something done and look to the next task. A. B. Curtiss


Ginger said...

Y, sorry to hear that your work is not working out for you!

My husband is a physicist. He is a very bright, hardworking, driven, "type A" person. Over the years, he has gone from job to job. At his current position, he has stayed 5.5 years, a record for him, in order to become vested in the retirement plan. Now he wants to move on again!

I tell you this because at times I've been judgemental and hard on him for not being able to "stick with" a job. He always found work, even if it meant commuting 86 miles each way to provide for us. He always felt the commute was better than the previous job.

Anyway, I was often critical and condescending about his job switching. My most frequent admonitions to him were: "Don't jump from the frying pan into the fire!" "No one likes their job!" " You'll never be happy anywhere!"

These days I feel that while there is a lot to be said for tenacity, sticking with something, and recognizing that no job is perfect, there are people in this world for whom staying with one job for a lifetime (or for a long stretch of years) would be stifling and painful. I think very bright people often thrive on the stimulation that comes with change, and benefit from seeking out the best places to learn and grow. In other words, simply being satisfied with a regular paycheck is not where it's at for everyone (though regular paychecks are a good thing!)

All this to say that moving on in your career may be helpful to you Y. I've read about your struggles with work for a while now and can't help but think that this is not your niche. I agree with A.B., that while you are there, make the most of it, find something there that lifts your spirits a bit to get you through the days. But looking for something else at the same time might also lift your spirits, as you can tell yourself "This is not forever. This is my temporary job."

It's clear that you are a very bright person who has a lot to offer. You aren't doing anyone a service staying put in a job that doesn't draw out your unique talents and gifts. There is something that is a better fit for you out there. You may have to wait a bit to find it, or it may be just around the corner (literally and figuratively!)

Best wishes!


Anonymous said...

Dear Ginger,

I wasn't checking the blog so I apologize for the late reply. Thank you so much for taking the time to comment and encourage me. I could no longer continue work and had am taking a long sick leave this time, to heal at a treatment center for a while and hopefully figure out something more in my niche.

Thank you again for your encouragements and support. I'll be wishing the best for you as well !

Kindest regards, Y