I'm Worried Because My Child is Very Self-focused

Dear A.B Curtiss 

I notice my child is very self focused and he is three years and the only child I have. Because of the inherited genes do you think this is a problem coming from my self focus?. Do you think I better stop having kids??

I need an advice because I am expecting another one coming. R___________

Dear R__________

All children are self-focused. It is normal for a three year old to be self-focused. It is something we are supposed to grow out of as we grow up, and we are taught social skills, and taught that we are to share with others. You can teach your child to have nice manners, to say please and thank you and to share their toys after the age of 4 and when they are 5 to 7 you can help them with social skills such as going to birthday parties and saying hello to other children there, and being nice to other children. Some children will be braver and be more willing to risk themselves in play acting such as reading out loud or performing songs for people. This can be encouraged at home--have your child perform for the family-- sing songs for you or dance for you and you applaud and cheer them. Sometimes you can do short plays when have some close friends over so your child can get the idea being social and outgoing and practicing performing will give them a sense of self-confidence. . A. B. Curtiss-----

Dear Curtiss 

Do you think it will help to take my child to a kindergarten.

Thanks so much for advising   R_____________

Dear R____________

At the age of three the most important thing for your child is for YOU and YOUR WIFE  to spend a lot of time with them, and bond with them so that you forge a strong, loving relationship and they trust you.  You should show interest in the small things they can accomplish and applaud their efforts when they succeed in doing something that they try so they have a good feeling about themselves, ..  Then when they are 4 or 5 they can go to kindergarten feeling good about themselves and will be able to socialize with their peers and learn social skills.  A. B. Curtiss