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Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Can my Negative Beliefs Prevent me from Being Successful with Brainswitching?

Dear A. B.

Thank you so much for your encouragement and common sense. My mind keeps demanding proof that this will work. It also keeps telling me that other people can do it because they don't have my exact issues and all this tangled mess of negativity, vanity, insecurity etc. I have so many negative assumptions and judgments that it seems odd that such a small change could really last.

I did well with it for a few days there and then I started not doing as well. I feel a bit like a rat on a wheel. Like, when do I get to quit running type of feeling. I think I tend to try to complicate things. It means so much to me that you are here and responsive to those of us that need the guidance. Yesterday I had the chance to spread the word about Brainswitch to someone else I know that struggles. He is looking forward to buying and reading it. 
peace to you, R__________

Dear R_________

Just remember that there is not a single one of us that can make it alone. A.B. Curtiss

Dear A. B.
And do you know people personally that have used this and no longer have the fear and depression?

Yes. One man in La Jolla was so grateful that he asked me out to tea. He said he has completely turned his life around. One of my good friends no longer is troubled by chronic depression since I told her about my brainswitch exercises more than 15 years ago. She's still good. Another of my friends handles depressive hits well but she still does not believe me about migraine headaches and so she still gets those every few months. 

I had lunch recently with a good friend who told me she keeps my book on the bookcase where she can see it when she wakes in the morning and that is all she needs to remember that she can get up, anyway, even if she doesn't feel like it, and get going. Those people I know, or have met in person. Many people that I don't know have written me that they are off medication and use brainswitching to get rid of any de pression that still comes. But it does sound like you are looking for excuses that this can't work. Can you see the futility of such a mindset? A. B. Curtiss

Dear A. B.
I can see the futility in it. I think I just have so much fear and such low confidence. I appreciate any success stories, they really help me believe. Thank you so much! R_________

Dear R________

It is a very scary thing when you finally realize that you and only you can save yourself, can make yourself happy. People can help with education and experience. But they can't absolve you from your own self-responsibility, or at least they should not try to absolve you from self-responsibility with excuses. In the end it is up to you to do the actual work of living every day, every hour, every minute to the best of your ability. Most people do not want the responsibility of saving themselves and taking over their lives. There are millions of people who simply give over to drugs, alcohol, and despair, none of which, in the end, change your brain for the better.  A. B. Curtiss

Dear A. B.
I just wonder if you can offer any words of encouragement. I am finding this to be so challenging. The thoughts in the negative vein are seemingly never-ending. I feel like as soon as I wake up I have to play "whack a mole" all day and I am tired. I also had a question  about beliefs. Do you think these sit there under it all and continue cause trouble? For example, let's say I hold the belief that I am generally messed up. Then I go about my day "fighting off" negative thoughts, but all the while the underlying idea lives in my consciousness that I am messed up. I don't exactly know what I am asking...but maybe yu do. In a certain sense I feel like I am pestering you, I hope that is not your perception.

I just wonder if it is "supposed" to be this difficult. I have made a commitment to myself to do this. I however continue to have the thought that "maybe some people aren't as good at redirecting, maybe I will need the medication after all". How long does a thought have to be there before the damage is done, because I also have the thought that once a thought gets in (and this gets back to the belief question) on a certain level I believe it. Even if it was only there for a second and I successfully redirect it. Am I that one step closer to taking medication again because that thought got in and formed a tiny underlying belief. Here's hoping this makes sense to you!

A soul who appreciates your guidance,  R____________

Dear R________

It doesn't matter what your brain believes or doesn't believe. You can rationally decide to override any negative belief with some more productive thought. You are used to be used by your brain. You are used to being reactive. You are used to reacting to thoughts that pop up.  You are just not used to being the user instead of the usee of your brain. You are still emotionally dependent in that you find it difficult to think rationally when you are emotionally upset.

You can learn to be emotionally independent. You can learn to use your brain instead of being used to it. You are not used to being proactive and creative in your thinking. You are not your brain. You are You and Your brain is your brain. You have a brain. Your brain no longer has a you when you decide to take charge of your thinking. Your brain cannot think any thought against your will. Yes, it can pop them up one after the other. But once you have more mileage with the more productive thoughts, then the unproductive ones will start to lose their power and not pop up as often. They can pop up now quite often, but they cannot think themselves because you can always refuse to think them and think some other thought instead.

You are in the process of re-making your brain with new neural circuits and trains of thought that are more productive. If it were easy then tens of millions of people would not be on anti-depressives. It is hard to grow up because, unfortunately, growth involves pain. That's always been true. That's why most people don't really grow up. It's too painful. That's why most people don't exercise. Too painful. Nothing really worthwhile is easy. That's the human experience. People are successful in direct relation to the amount of effort they are willing to put into improving themselves. You have made a commitment. That is what is necessary. And you have to keep re-committing yourself in the face of discouragement. Recommitting is very simple but it is very hard. You just have to keep chosing a better thought, or a thought that distracts you from the negative thought. But you have to move independently of your emotional upset and this is hard for you now. It won't always be so hard. Remember, even discouragement is nothing more than a negative thought which does not have to be thunk.  A.B. Curtiss

2 comments:

BLUEYEDANE said...

really love this advice. So true. I was just thinking to myself this morning how grateful I am for a choice. When you pointed out the part of choice called interstitial choice I realized how often I allow my brain to be thought rather than actually thinking or choosing what my brain thinks. Wish people realized this. Thankyou!

A. B. Curtiss said...

Thanks so much for your comment. Knowing about interstitial choice can really change your life. Well, that is, if you actually decide to make a choice. A. B. Curtiss